Have you ever really wanted to achieve something, started enthusiastically and then given up and abandoned the idea?

You declared confidently that it would not be easy, but you were determined to achieve the desired result this time.

So what went wrong?

When “hard” obstacles appear in your path, you are faced with a temptation, a desire, to return to the old, more comfortable situation. You doubt whether it’s worth all the effort, and so on, until you surrender. Maybe you decide that you lack that special something, that you don’t have enough willpower. And it becomes a convenient excuse. You say, “I did try but what am I to do? Not everyone has a strong will”.

We think some people are blessed with a strong will from birth. We think willpower is a talent and a privilege, granted only to a special few. We think willpower is typically associated with achieving extremely difficult objectives, unattainable by most people. We associate willpower with great effort, deprivation, iron discipline and even violence. We think great willpower is not for ordinary people. These thoughts are complete nonsense!

What Actually is Willpower? In Wikipedia, willpower is defined as “the human ability to consciously control his actions, directing them to consciously set goals and to overcome internal and external difficulties and obstacles”. Synonyms for willpower include: desire, aspiration, persistence, determination, commitment, tenacity, perseverance, strong intention, motivation and self-control. Different psychological disciplines describe “will” and “willpower” in various ways. For example, the classical psychoanalysis of Sigmund Freud did not accept the existence of free will as a function of the psyche.

I would equate “will” and “willpower” with one word – determination. Willpower is natural and it is a power that each person possesses.

We do not achieve our goals, because we do not have any will, but because we are not sufficiently motivated, because we are impatient, because we have insufficient self-confidence, et cetera, et cetera. There is an expectation that “you will” (i.e. the future imperative tense) and that this requirement will be linked to superhuman efforts and strict discipline. From the outset, these expectations prepare you for failure. So, the first thing you need to do is:

#1 Change Your Perception of Willpower.

Do not say “I have no willpower” because it is self-indulgent and programmed for failure. Everybody has willpower. It is not a privilege for the chosen. You also have willpower. You just have to exercise it. You can train your willpower by initially setting yourself small, more easily attainable goals and progressing in increasing steps.

#2 Have Motivation.

The most important requirement to achieve anything is motivation. It is the driving force. We’ve all heard stories of people, living in difficult circumstances, who overcame their situation to achieve the impossible and become winners or heroes. They amazed us with their willpower and fortitude. What is the power in these people? What is that iron will? Only strong willpower made it possible for them to achieve success in conditions, unbearable for “normal” healthy people. All these people have motivation and set goals. Knowing why they wanted something helped them to go through all the how of achieving something. This understanding of what we are striving for is the fuel that keeps us going. Write down what you want to achieve and why you want to achieve it. What will bring you the desired result? How badly do you want it? What is motivating you? Write down these things and re-read them frequently. Remind yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing!

#3 Make a Decision And Stick To It.

Very often, part-way to achieving our objectives, we give up, because of doubts and second thoughts. You might say to yourself “although I think this is correct, maybe there is another way to …”. Stop right there! The decision has been taken. Do not waste time and energy in re-consideration. Do not think about whether it is the right way or not. Just keep going.

#4  Make a Plan

Generally, I do not like to make a lot of plans. However, I am convinced that things will work out okay, when I make a plan that follows my rules and is consistent with my personality. After all, it is always nice to follow your own path and your own personal rules. What is important is that the plan is your natural course of development.

#5 Do Not Make Drastic Changes in Your Life.

It is easy to be too decisive and try to take on too much. For example, “tomorrow I get a new qualification. Tomorrow I will stop smoking. Tomorrow I will start eating healthily. Tomorrow I will start thinking positively. Tomorrow I will start going to the gym. It is good to be eager, but all that is too much to start in one day, or even in a month of Sundays. Inevitably, you will give up or postpone everything indefinitely. So, you need to make a plan that includes a gradual change in lifestyle that prioritizes your targets and that has a schedule to enable you to strive towards them one by one.

#6 Start Slowly With Small Steps.

The most common reason for giving up is that we start trying to do too much too quickly. If you start with a great effort, you will quickly get tired and stop early. The best athletes running a marathon will start slow, stay calm and conserve their energy to last the entire race.

#7 Make it a Pleasant, Fun Achievement.

Usually we think that in order to achieve something it requires hard work, endurance and self-denial. Instead, the secret of a strong will is not the effort, patience or constancy. Achieving a goal should be pleasant. You can make it a fun game. Actually, the best and lasting results are achieved on the path of least effort. What you need is just keep going along that path.

#8 Focus on the Process.

Usually we do not see results right away and this discourages us. We say to ourselves: “look, nothing happening, it doesn’t make sense.” This is, because we are focused on the immediate situation and we are constantly seeking evidence that something is happening to justify our efforts. But the more you look for evidence, the more burdensome the process becomes and the more likely you are to give up. Just carry on, focus on the pleasure of the process and it will come true.

#9 Do Not Impose Penalties for “Failures.”

Realize that you are in the course of achieving a sweeping change and an elevation. This is normal. Recognize the potential for adverse mind games. It is amazing how our minds can “cheat” and create unnecessary difficulties and obstacles. Have you ever noticed that when you want something and start to follow the new plan, suddenly everything seems to stand against you and something happens to frustrate you? This is actually your mind playing games with you. Subconsciously we find reasons to go back to the old way of life. Do not punish yourself. Don’t go on the attack. Don’t get harassed. Do not, absolutely do not, feel sorry for yourself! Just at that moment when you’re about to give up, you need support and understanding. And if you do not give it to yourself, who else will? Accept that your resistance is normal, forgive yourself for a moment of weakness and carry on. Punishment is not necessary, you are doing something, and already that is a success. Just continue with what you’re doing.

#10 Do Not Suppress Your Feelings.

As our willpower is associated with endurance and strength, we do not dare to admit to ourselves the fear that we might be confused or frustrated. It is hard to admit that we are scared and that we are tired. These feelings are not a failure or a weakness. Even the greatest heroes were afraid and felt depressed. You have the power to be strong and unafraid, to carry on anyway, to pass through the various stages and again to keep on going.

#11 Enlist Support.

In moments of despair and hesitation, it is very helpful to have positive, motivated people around you. Remember to share your feelings with strong, proactive individuals. They will motivate you. Furthermore, there are many helpful resources online to inspire you and give you strength. Bookmark a few sites that resonate with you, join their community, and spend 15-30 minutes per day to stay connected with like-minded people. This will keep you convinced that you are not alone on this journey! When you achieve what you have striven for, the feeling is amazing. You feel like a winner! Then you can say: “I have faith”. You will have even more confidence in your abilities to achieve other “difficult” things, because you know you have the will. Tell us, do you have your own methods of strengthening your willpower and reaching your goals? What are some achievements you feel truly proud of?

This is a Guest Post from Ashton from Brainwave Love

Ashton finds life’s purpose in helping people reach their full potential, attain their goals, and manifest the life of their dreams. He’s helped many achieve massive breakthroughs and has proven the journey can also be fun and enjoyable. Visit his blog at BrainwaveLove.com to access some of his best free resources or get yourself started with his Complete Change Your Life System.

Our friends at Trinity Affirmations have compiled a list of 100 positive affirmations from both the classic authors from the past, and people who live and work today, helping others achieve a better life. Read through them to find the ones for you to use, or use them as an inspiration for your own affirmations:

1. I experience love in every aspect of my life. Love is my primary motivation in every relationship. Love bonds me to the rhythm of the universe. ~ Deepak Chopra
2. I emanate love and joy, complete presence and openness, toward all beings. ~ Eckhart Tolle
3. I am a radiant center of love, giving forth blessings of encouragement, rather than curses of judgment and limitation. ~ Joan Borysenko
4. All that is mine by Divine Right is now released and reaches me in great avalanches of abundance, under grace in miraculous ways. ~ Florence Scovel Shinn
5. I am absolutely fearless; there is nothing to fear; fear is not a reality; it is not the truth of being. It is only the absence of courage, based upon ignorance of the great cause. ~ Orison Swett Marden
6. I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy. ~ Charles Haanel
7. It gives me great comfort to realize that it’s not my job to change for others. ~ Abraham-Hicks
8. I support my growth by choosing how I interpret my past and envision my future. ~ Lisa Nichols
9. I know that all difficulties in my life are encoded with hidden messages. It’s up to me to decipher and use them for the enhancement of my own personal growth, and my service to mankind and our planetary home. ~ Andreas Moritz
10. I am powerfully positive in everything I think, do and say. ~ Brian Tracy
11. I am creating financial security through the use of my talents. ~ Marianne Mitchell
12. All I need is within me now and I have the courage to see it through. ~ Tony Robbins
13. Today I choose the higher road – the path of charity, acceptance, love, selflessness, kindness. ~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie
14. Money is flowing to me from both expected and unexpected sources. ~ John Assaraf
15. I feel energized and alive throughout the day. ~ Michael Neill
16. I am at the perfect place at the perfect time to meet the perfect people to fulfill my perfect dream. ~ John Demartini
17. I am so happy and grateful now that money comes to me in increasing quantities through multiple sources on a continuous basis. ~ Bob Proctor
18. I am content with what I have. I rejoice in the way things are. I realize that there is nothing lacking. The whole world belongs to me. ~ Eckhart Tolle
19. I respect myself for being me. ~ Monte Farber and Amy Zerner
20. I start the day with love, fill the day with love, and end the day with love. This is the quickest path to God. ~ Sai Baba
21. I now go free. In that process I release all others from my demands and expectations I have placed on them. I choose to be free. I allow others to be free. I forgive myself and I forgive them. And so it is. ~ Jack Canfield
22. I am one with the infinite riches of my subconscious mind. It is my right to be rich, happy and successful. Money flows to me freely, copiously and endlessly. I am forever conscious of my true worth. I give of my talents freely, and I am wonderfully blessed financially. It is wonderful! ~ Joseph Murphy
23. I focus not on the 100 things I may have to do at some future time, but on the one thing I can do now. ~ Eckhart Tolle
24. I am so grateful for the beautiful way the trillions of cells in my body work together! – Patricia Crane
25. I am the master of my life, free to create anything I desire. ~ Moira Hutchison
26. The images in my mind have creative power. They breathe existence into possibilities that never existed before. ~ Deepak Chopra
27. I only attract loving people in my world for they are a mirror of what I am. ~ Louise Hay
28. All that I seek opens to me and beckons to life’s fullness. I enter into my Divine heritage and walk with the great and the true. My pathway is filled with ease, for I am thinking to take me to my goal. ~ Raymond Charles Barker
29. I am an infinite being. The age of my body has no bearing on what I do or who I am. ~ Wayne Dyer
30. I release all drama from my life and now get energy from peace. ~ Cheryl Richardson
31. All barriers to my success are now dissolved, and I am effortlessly making my dreams come true. ~ Moira Hutchison
32. It is easy for me to maintain an absolutely clear focus in managing all the loose ends in my life by focusing on all the successful outcomes that I am destined to fulfill on this planet. ~ David Allen
33. I have absolute certainty in my ability to generate any amount of income I choose. ~ John Assaraf
34. Today I will spread joy in random and beautiful ways. ~ Brian Tracy
35. My inner guidance is there for me to call on anytime I need or want extra clarity, wisdom, knowledge, support, creative inspiration, love, or companionship. ~ Shakti Gawain
36. God is my infinite supply and large sums of money come to me quickly and easily under greatest good for all people. ~ Jack Canfield
37. Today I bestow the essence of love upon everything. Everyone I meet shall be lovely to me. My soul meets the soul of the Universe in everyone. This love is a healing power touching everything into wholeness. ~ Ernest Holmes
38. I use my intuition and intelligence to guide me at all times. ~ Pamela Wells
39. My life has a purpose, and my work is a labor of love. ~ Napoleon Hill
40. I lovingly do everything I can to assist my body in maintaining perfect health. ~ Louise Hay
41. I know that I am pure in spirit and that I always have been and always will be. ~ Uell S. Anderson / Kelly Howell
42. Thank you for everything, I have no complaint whatsoever. ~ Zen master Sono
43. I renew my spirit by releasing guilt, fear and shame, acknowledging the truth and having accountability for my actions. ~ Lisa Nichols
44. I look with expectation to my next moment, which is fresh and new. ~ Cheryl Richardson
45. The right circumstances and the right people are already here and will show up on time. ~ Wayne Dyer
46. Every day, in every way, I am thinking more and more good positive thoughts! And every day, in every way, I am feeling happier and happier! ~ Rhonda Byrne
47. I have mastered the art of intention. I am not attached to the past or how things should turn out. I adapt quickly to errors and mistakes. I have good antennae and am alert to tiny signals. I have no trouble embracing uncertainty and ambiguity. I am able to see the meaning in chance events. ~ Deepak Chopra
48. I love all of myself, including my body, my mind and all of my feelings. ~ Shakti Gawain
49. I now draw from the abundance of the spheres my immediate and endless supply. All Channels are free! All Doors are open! ~ Florence Scovel Shinn
50. I cause others to believe in me because I believe in them and I believe in myself. ~ Tony Robbins
51. Luminous and productive energy flows through me. ~ Marianne Mitchell
52. I have the ability to dissolve my fixed boundaries, and expand into, and merge with, those things (beings) that I normally see as other, by consciously generating feelings of love, compassion, and universal oneness. ~ Belleruth Naparstek
53. I care how I feel and it is my desire to feel good. ~ Abraham-Hicks
54. I am intelligent, competent, persistent and creative. I am health conscious, balanced and clean. I am flexible, punctual and thrifty. ~ Zig Ziglar
55. I am energy.  I am strength.  I am power.  I am filled with omnipotent life.  The vitality of God permeates every fiber of my being.  I am well and whole in every part of my body. ~ Emmet Fox
56. I am well and strong and vital; I am on the road to eternal youth; I am beautiful and pure and good; I am opulent and happy and free. ~ Helen Wilmans
57. I am attracting and sending loving healing energy with every breath and every step I take today. ~ Sohini Sinha
58. I am in the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing. ~ Louise Hay
59. I affirm fearlessness of that which I have feared. ~ Frank Channing Haddock
60. I work without strain, walk without hurry, and live without tension, for I am in tune with the Infinite. ~ Eric Butterworth
61. I make no judgments, and have no expectations. I’ve given up the need to know why things happen as they do. I trust that the unscheduled events of my life are a form of spiritual direction. I have the courage to make the choices I need to make, I accept what I cannot change, and I have the wisdom to know the difference. ~ Carolyn Myss
62. Everything I want also wants me. ~ Jack Canfield
63. Every day in every way, I am getting better and better. ~ Emile Coue
64. I can feel my body benefiting from my newfound ease. ~ Abraham-Hicks
65. I feel the hope of achievement. ~ Napoleon Hill
66. I trust myself in making great decisions. ~ Brian Tracy
67. Of course it is working even now, whether I can believe it or not. ~ Frederick Bailes
68. I can achieve whatever I set my mind to. ~ John Assaraf
69. I am an honorable person who is truly grateful for the opportunity life has given me. ~ Zig Ziglar
70. I am a shining hugger, and I embrace everything with love! ~ John Demartini
71. I promise myself to be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind. ~ Christian D. Larson
72. I have a deep knowingness that there is nothing out there that is truly against me, or is counter-productive to my growth and learning. This certainly serves me as an impenetrable shield of protection. ~ Andreas Moritz
73. I am the designer of my destiny, the author of my autobiography. I hold the pen in my hand. ~ Lisa Nichols
74. I have the ability to accomplish any task I set my mind to with ease and comfort. ~ Wayne Dyer
75. I trust my intuition absolutely, so I am always receptive to the signals that God and my deep self, give to me. I know I will always be given the clue, the information and the inspiration, to carry me through. ~ Andrew Harvey
76. Today I am energized by the vitality of the Living Spirit.  All the power that there is, all the energy and vitality that there is, is mine.  I am filled with an enthusiasm for living, a joyous expectation of the more that is to be, and a gratitude for what has been and now is. ~ Ernest Holmes
77. My peace is so vast and so deep, that anything that is NOT peace disappears into it, as if it had never existed. ~ Eckhart Tolle
78. My supply is endless, inexhaustible and immediate and comes to me under grace in perfect ways. ~ Florence Scovel Shinn
79. I am now attuned to my higher purpose and my life is unfolding exactly as it needs to. ~ Shakti Gawain
80. Regardless of my outer circumstances, I know that I am completely and eternally safe. ~ Joan Borysenko
81. Day by day in every way I am becoming more successful. ~ Napoleon Hill
82. I surrender my ego and no longer let fear rule my life. I have love, faith, and hope. ~ Pamela Wells
83. My subconscious mind is my partner in my success. ~ John Kehoe
84. I make friends with my fear. I am unstoppable. ~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie
85. Giving brings me happiness at every stage of its expression. I experience joy in forming the intention to be generous. I experience joy in the actual act of giving something. And I experience joy in remembering the fact that I have been a giver. ~ Buddha
86. At every moment, I have the choice of either feeling gratitude for what has been given to me, or grievance for what is missing. I choose gratitude. ~ John Welwood
87. Being kind enables me to enlarge my small personality to embrace all of life. I practice it consistently in deed, word, and thought, so it will lead me to my supreme goal: the realization that all of us are one. ~ Eknath Easwaran
88. God is the Power, I am the Vision, together we are a Team. ~ John Demartini
89. All is well with me right now and getting better still. ~ Abraham-Hicks
90. Being myself involves no risks. It is my ultimate truth, and I live it fearlessly. ~ Wayne Dyer
91. I am succeeding by attracting to myself the forces I wish to use and the cooperation of other people. ~ Tony Robbins
92. I possess authentic power, because I am doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing. My life is filled with meaning and purpose. I have no doubts. I have no fears. I am happy to be alive. Everything I do is joyful and exciting. I look forward with anticipation to each day and each night. ~ Gary Zukav
93. All that is mine by divine right is now released and reaches me in great avalanches of abundance, under grace in miraculous ways. ~ Moira Hutchison
94. I’m no longer in a hurry, the way I used to be. There is a feeling of spaciousness in my work and play, as well as energy, zest, curiosity, humor, and joy. ~ Jakusho Kwong
95. I know that death is not death, but a recycling of energy, a remodulation of my cells, according to higher assignments in my soul’s progression. My spirit does not die, but rather enters new channels of life. ~ Marianne Williamson
96. I choose to live a worry-free life because I know that anxiety crowds out productivity. ~ Gary Vurnum
97. I honor all relationships, particularly the difficult ones, as lessons in learning to give and receive love. ~ Joan Borysenko
98. I am entitled to miracles. ~ Dr. Helen Schucman
99. I leave behind both my failures and my accomplishments.  What I do today will create a new and better future filled with inner joy. ~ J Donald Walters
100. I deserve to have a great day. ~ Brad Yates

Finally, as a bonus quote, another great one by Zig Ziglar:

This amazing list was compiled and presented to you by Trinity Affirmations, the world’s leading website with positive affirmations in audio format.

They also have a gift for you – a FREE album with self-esteem affirmations that you can download immediately and feel the benefits of total self-appreciation in actions within minutes of listening!